Karl Urban’s fingers
female. cis. straight(-ish).
i'm a disaster and you cannot help me.
Alright, so I went with the mirror!verse fic I’d been working on! I don’t write a lot of mirror!verse so heeeeeere we go!
A pad slammed down on the table, causing the doctor to jump and clutch his head, groaning.
"Is what I heard true, McCoy?"
Leonard looked up from under his disheveled bangs, glaring at the stern, dark, beautiful face and too neat ponytail. Her face and posture exuded calm and control, but her burning dark eyes told him she was furious.
"Ugh, Ny," Leonard answered, giving up on focusing on the ancient book he’d been reading through, his hangover making it near impossible to focus anyway, "It is too early darlin’ for me to even guess what you’re squawking about."
When her eyes narrowed, McCoy reflected that while they were as good of friends as people could be in this world (aka not purposely destroying or planning to destroy the other for their own future gain as it was currently more advantageous to have the other alive and on their side), that their status could be altered if need be, and very swiftly.
He raised his hands in apology, “Sorry darlin’, really,” the fact that she softened slightly at that term instead of sharpened showed that he hadn’t fucked up that much, “I’m just having a hell of a mornin’ right now.
She slammed the pad again, making him cringe and curse, and for any other cadets nearby in the library to scurry away like mice. Her eyes narrowed again and she hissed, “Well you damn straight better be if the rumours about last night are true.”
He blinked, slowly and sleepily, this morning was being especially rough, as he asked, “Last night? Rumours?”
She leaned in right to his personal space, voice low and lethal, “That you fucked Jim Kirk.”
Leonard blinked again, making sure not to flinch this time, as he answered slowly, “…who?”
It wasn’t a twitch, Uhura didn’t twitch, but something moved in her face and posture that suggested she was losing a bit of a grip on her firm control. She took a deep inhale with her nose and neatly sit down across from him.
"You fucked the Empire’s legendary son, the notoriously deadly ambitious psycho who you damn well know to stay the fuck away from.”
Nyota didn’t tend to swear. Not unnecessarily. Leonard woke up a little from this as his memories from last night began to trickle back over his pulsing headache.
"Oh," he started, "That Jim Kirk.” He laughed, “Ny, of course I know better than to come within a 50 metre radius of that bloodthirsty psychopath, you know me better than that.” He gave a look that implied I’ve had enough pain and suffering in my life to know to not go out and actively look for it in that terror of a man.
"One, I didn’t fuck Jim Kirk, it was some blonde, blue eyed Adonis from the bar last night. I never even caught his name and left before I could really remember his face. Two," Hazel eyes grew serious, "it wasn’t me doing the fucking." He grinned, "I limped all the way here." And it was worth it.
That much he could remember. He’d been trashed last night and looking to be thoroughly fucked into and through a mattress. After approaching someone gorgeous and blonde and with the bluest eyes he’d ever seen, he’d been successful. Repeatedly. And so very thoroughly.
It was surely a twitch this time, it had to be, as Nyota said slowly, “McCoy. I’d thought you were intelligent but today is truly a test on my own judgement.” McCoy glared, almost a pout, as she continued, “Kirk is a blue eyed blonde Adonis, that’s one of the reasons he’s so dangerous.” She held up a strict finger, “One of the reasons. One of many.”
just because i don’t follow u back doesn’t mean i think u have a shitty blog. you might just have posts/fandoms/stuff i don’t really want on my dash. and hey, that’s fine. it’s YOUR tumblr you’re here for you and that’s goodgreatawesome
but please don’t think me not following you back means i hate u 5ever and that u can never inbox me or reply to my posts or follow me on twitter or something b/c that is not what it means at all
"Do you think that your 16 year old daughter hasn’t masturbated already? Like, do you really think there’s anything in that scene that this chick hasn’t already tried when the lights go out at night, or in the bathroom, or in the tub, or with the shower head or something like that? I’m telling you, man, I’m not teaching this broad anything new. If I were to create a rating system, I wouldn’t even put murder right at the top of the chief offenses. I would put rape right at the top, and assault against women. Because it’s so insanely overused and insulting how much it’s overused in movies as a plot device, a woman in peril. That, to me, is offensive, yet that shit skates."
Kevin Smith (director) on the ridiculousness of movies about sex receiving NC-17 ratings while extremely violent movies get by with R ratings. (via kevinnj)
Bring it d o w n
robert has the best smile out of the whole avengers cast
I can’t hear you
over his glorious smile
are you sure
to play this game?
I am very sure
That this game
Is already lost
oh so we’re going pg-13 now?
hmm too bad robert
is lacking in that area
meanwhile Ruffalo fans are over here like
Come on now guys, they
OH MY GOD HAHAHA
Where does your tongue stay when you’re not speaking? If you’re an English-speaker, it’s behind the top front teeth. If you’re a Russian-speaker, it’s on the bottom of your mouth, lying flat.
I JUST FREAKING CONSCIOUSLY CHECKED AND TRIED TO MAKE IT LAY FLAT BUT NO, IT’S SERIOUSLY AT THE TOP OF MY MOUTH. I DON’T LIKE THIS
Imma just let this sit here
TEARS OF JOY.
*crosses fingers, toes, and everything else that’s crossable*
Now if we can just convince all those moronic motherfuckers that don’t believe HIV actually exists, we’ll be golden.